After the hours,

the moments too many deep

in waiting, deep

in longing;

and after the pain

from nights stretched taught

with uncertainty, chest

tight (so tight) with anxiety –

after all that, breath is shallow,

pallor drained from a brain

in turmoil, ever wondering:

what had changed?

Was this body unworthy


of being loved?

Or were there darker problems


in the one who was loved?